Last of the rhyme lords Master of dime stores I'll give ya the answer ya climb towards After some grime words My intentions are dubious My lyrics are studious It's ingrained in my nucleus To Blow up like Vesuvius Mount More number ones than I can count You can't even comprehend such a high amount Got more gold plaques than a rich dentist Fat stacks more populous than the census Rolled in wraps like it was just lettuce From each track and every sentence I make paper Stone cold flow like glaciers Try to step to me and I'll waste ya Are you sure you're ready to face the Last of the rhyme lords. Some say that the last will be the first and the first will be the last The way that I draft and craft my verse You can survey my thirst en masse Like a dude in the desert jonesin for his next sip collude what I exert is engrossing that convex shit I include with this insert I'm exposing that ma next script will prove that my head blurts imposing and complex quips I keep my i' before e's, except after labor day Devise clever schemes I'm adept at making capers pay I Improvise new routines and collect a paper buffet Don't compromise my steez I'm in effect in a major way I'm frighting as a creature feature One half preacher half teacher If you step to either I'll beat ya Are you really ready to meet the Last of the rhyme lords.

Before we proceed There's some junk I gotta read So here's what you need To get up to speed First things first My birth was unrehearsed But out I burst Into the arms of a nurse Then time passed, like it generally does And it was in my grasp, which was useful because I got bored with my present So I came back to yours Be assured that my intent Is to get into stacked chicks drawers What you call the future I call the past Shout out to Gunter Pendergrast I travel through time Pulling dazzling crimes Kicking baffling rhymes I keep gravel in mine Whenever I step up to grab the mic my endeavors sure to excite Folk often tell me That my rhymes make em jelly Everything I sell heeds Finecost like a deli So never think my shits fake Everything I spit's great Seldom is my dick straight Welcome to the mixtape.

They call me MC Hovercraft I float on beats like rubber rafts Don't be surprised when you discover that I'm living large like Howard Taft if there's beef I'll smother that I'll even call your mother fat I may even write another draft Cuz my first one didn't cover half of the facts that prove I'm straight tits I used to work with Fred Flinstone down in the slate pits But I got fired but I didn't really give a shit cuz All in all it is their loss and now they gotta live with it Hovercraft walk on water like Jesus Christ And when I'm with the ladies they all say "He's so nice" When it comes to lyrics kid, you know I got a bevy If you don't believe me ask Marty McFly and he will say they're heavy The second verse starts now This section will enforce how My compositions are ammunition I recon my words will wow I'm so well versed Even my worst verse works It's reinforced After my thirsts nursed first In this rhyme Business I'm Powerful, but sour still Like citrus; lime Verbal fitness; fine Like a gymnasts prime When I perform I transform Like Optimus prime My shits divine I'm not a blow hard But my flows bombard My shits like magic tricks Is this yo card? So many folks envy tTll they get into a frenzy I'm never trendy always deadly My lyrics are hella heavy

There's no place to hide Cuz I already eyed the vicinity I'm omniscient like divinity But I kick my ministry differently with a litany of verbal calligraphy that's proof of my ability Ayyo It's awesome how often I watch 'Lost' in Boston Causing mass hysteria just like the higgs bosson Giant squid? You know Jaque Cuesteo saw some Franklin's best seafood's at 51st and Rawson Avenue one is half of two With that construe that it's true That the math I spews my aptitude Cuz I'm that dude My mustache protrudes If my cash is overdue I'll thrash you till your Black and blue Best pay attention when I'm talking No misapprehension, I'm rhyme rocking Must I mention I only write raw things When I sense pretension then I' start chopping Hovercraft aint no dude to step to My hoods on lock, I view who's crept through From Waukesha to the moons of Neptune Hovercraft aint no dude to step to

I'm quite berserk mate I like to work late My goal is success Unlike a right to work state Dictate dick tease Lactate trick, please I'm a prodigal thieve With some logical peeves Compared to old school I'm Mitochondrial Eve Known to cause hysteria, cuz I'm at best a maven I rock a beard from Algeria Don't suggest shavin' Unlike god I don't care if ya images are graven Scariest dude in the area, call me Midwest Craven Apollo, Hotdog, Racetrack, and Starbuck Just know that when they say frack they mean fuck Deitial disagreements, one god or many Equal sorts of grievance, was it odd, well plenty Resistance is hopeless Cuz what I spit is dopeness I'm a prominent killer of women just like cystic fibrosis..

When Chaos grabs the mic, it's your best bet to get smart Say lots of junk forthright, lest we forget the best part I slay bosses and the like, I just let the cassette start They lost the power to excite, they get reset, a fresh start I'll maybe kick some highly fly ish Cuz I'm crazy sick, a wiley virus My squad will tout I'm blogged about Like racy pics of Miley Cyrus I'm a powerful peer Who's hour is near I'll make ya cower in fear As I devour your ear I empower a mere Flower to veer And start Towering here And now or next year I disavow to cohere To our sour veneer Our as in we're I shower in beer. Cleanliness is next to godliness or so I'm told My pen insists to body this and bestow this rhyme flow gold What I say's so stylish That folk don't delay to buy this I'm risque to the highest Like the TSA no fly list I'm so pious, with no bias To those folks who want to try this I bleed kindness. cuz I'm the finest I'm desirous like sirens Those pirates of my likeness And my mindset, they're just spineless I'm the nicest, they must be mindless Cuz if you step to me it's crisis Here's some guidence, just stay silent Cuz when I drop science it's a giant Stay compliant not defiant Or else my violence may just triumph Cleanliness is next to godliness or so I'm told My pen insists to body this and bestow this rhyme flow gold Folks often sock it to me Cuz the schlock I talks so groovy I'm not into pot or doobie In Iraq I rock a kufi The crock you hock it's hella fruity I walk the walk really and truly The way I mock it shocks, it's spooky Like a taught blockbuster movie Soft and moody, Not too goofy My shits on lock, and yours is puny I drop doozies that got ya woozy I keep it hot like a jacuzzi Naughty groupies trot their coochies Their only thought is they gotta do me My cock will pop their booties I knock 'em raw just like sushi

This here joints for all my fellow creeps And all yall other deviants to make it complete The dudes when with a girl, and she falls a sleep And their first thought is to jerk off onto her feet Now check the situation, you're on vacation You see a girl, get a tingly sensation She gives you her number, and wants you to text her You want to study her cunt like you was Poondexter Next day you call her, hoping to ball her She says she can once she ditches her father She gets to your hotel around two o clock an You want to get busy but she won't stop talkin As your mugs go clink you shrug and think That You're feeling really glad that you drugged her drink Things are going well, but they start to careen Once she lets you know that she's only thirteen Your modus operandi's to remover her panties But now you're scared your about to pull a Polanski But so what if society don't approve Age is just a number, so just bust a move Now you meet a girl at a local bar She's hot as shit and you're stoked by far You wanna take her out of there and you hope your car Will be romantic enough to get in her bone yard As she talks your listening, and she's not bitching Aall chicks should be like this is what your wishing This type of chicks too good to be true So you must make sure you follow through Before you get to third base, she says come to my place You're fine with that, you just wanna jizz on her face You get to her pad and start to take her clothes off She gets on her knees and tells you to hold off You're in luck and she starts sucking But after a while you want to start fucking You bend her over, to put it in her gash She stops you there and says put it in my ass You wish you had seen this, cuz when you reach around your Venus And go for her clit you find she has a penis But fuck it, who cares if you fuck a dude, a hole is just a hole g, bust a move. Now you're at the store buying groceries for dinner While you're browsing through the cheese you eye a winner Your eyes meet and you see a glimmer And you know right away that you want to be in her As you approach her, she moves closer You do your best to keep your composure You introduce yourself and she seems impressed As she goes for the bottom shelf, you look up her dress One week later, you start to date her And you're finally getting in to some sexual behavior She tells you that she sorta feels sick But you ignore it, you wanna get in her slit You're on top and boots are knocking You don't even realize that she's stopped talking You're into it, so you give her a slap But start to get concerned when she doesn't react You start believing that she's sleeping Then you notice that she's not breathing But in a few pumps, you're gonna splooge Shelf life's for chumps, just bust a move

A stanza of some poetry A glance at getting to knowin' me A chance to hear my flow for free So check which I bestow to thee I rock words in all shapes and all forms Folks are shocked and agape when I perform My favorite pick up line is "Does this smell like cloraphorm?" But I still kill it, even if the audience is less than warm Cuz Even if a groups morale is nil You best believe in this locale I will Make sure your ear canal is full Cuz, I assure, my rhymes are infallible Like the pope in the Vatican If it's dope it's Pat Havican I deem it worthy to be pervy Like groping a mannequin I've never read the Dead Zone The last bit I said intones This lines a thread I've sewn To get me to my head phones Which are eighty ohms, of course Which makes 'em weighty domes of force My flows stone cold Like Davey Jones' Corpse

Recently I was asked How I kick it so deadly Ceaselessly unsurpassed A prolific f'ing MC I sat back and thought For a couple of seconds I found the attack I sought And smugly, I reckoned I just engage in some libations And pen essays of innovation I'm amazed my dumb creations Get such high praise from publications The NY Times love my sci fi rhymes They implied my grimes By a fly guy in his prime But, fuck it, print media is dead Folks use the internet instead With a mouse click you pic How you'll be mislead Because it is sourced from us My rhymes are coarse as some pumice Me? I choose to be gluten free Kinda like hummus Now, who's the hoser, eh? I will expose today That my dossier's supposed to say I murder chicks from Beau Soleil Straight outta da future and into your headphones Hoovercraft will make sure you that aint mislead, holms Dropping the realist shit from often misread tomes My eyes can see the truth, I got infrared cones You can try ta.. front on my hover But you'll never touch my craft Or uncover the style I utter Cuz I know you yall covet that I could but you aint got the brains Plus it's just not fun It aint blood pumping thorough these veins It's hip hop son Like a majestic river Teeming with spawning trout I have an epic quiver Of rhymes convening, wanting to get out I pluck my vocal chords back And I just let them fly With luck what I'm aiming towards that When struck will get ya high When it hits my ears, silence is like misery I make it disappear, that's how I sense my victory When I preach, I teach, the guidance of history I hope my speech will reach, those to whom science is a mystery They say that humans roots end all up in Africa But it was proven on the program Battlestar Galactica As the show ran we learned that no mans DNA per capita Started in the Sudan, no we moved in from Caprica

These Mc's pounce with a sturm und drang askew assort By all accounts we got the slang that few thwart I must announce that you're crew'll fall short We stay on the bounce like a kangaroo court Get with the times, it's MC Hovercraft My rhymes, thems be gutter raps Don't suffer that other crap My lyrics are like blubber, fat I grab the mic and just let it ring I will excite, it's sorta my thing When I bite, I leave em tremblin' Cuz when fed after midnight I become a gremlin No one can do it better Not even Eddie Vedder With each endevour I always kick it clever But not so smart that I forget the art I must impart that is the hardest part Crews got dudes deployed ta bite this Who are soon annoyed I'm righteous To help me prove my point the way I fuse my joints it's sorta similar to rheumatoid arthritis So to answer your question I guess I should mention I hope you learned your lesson Cuz court is now in session When I grab the mic it's gonna get perilous I keep it short and simple never letting shit get garrulous In all of hip hop aint no one can compare to this I aint never coming gently I constantly be tearin' this Beat apart with appeal spit real shit till the elite depart The streets my heat brand name like Cuisinart Hip hop's part of us we excrete the art drop heat real smart Mouth watering lyrics like a sweet egg tart If you don't know my steez than I guess you never will You can get a kick to the throat if you think your clever still I tied an invoice to a pole and string then I played some tether bill Dyslexic metal heads rock to 'Life No Leather Till' Hovercraft kickin' it lick Chuck Norris Ok dj, bring back the chorus